Smile ;)

2012

Goodbye 2012. I'm really glad the world did not end this year because I still have lots to do and couldn't make that December 21st deadline.

When I begin to recall the year, at first I cannot escape the last few months. The affects still have a hold of me. The holidays have a way of doing that to me. But if I allow myself to move past all the tinsel and wrapping paper, past the horrific shootings at Sandy Hook that seem to haunt me daily, past the election craziness, and the pumpkins and skeletons of Halloween... I begin to remember the past year in it's entirety.

My year began with creativity. As an author I had to focus on editing my book, gaining reviewers, and shooting a video teaser for the novel that would be published in April of 2012. As a musician it was all about recording an album, making a music video and the release of the best album I have ever been a part of, 'The Lovers' by Wall of Tom was released in May of 2012.

Then came lots of promotions, interviews, and PR surrounding 'This Rock in My Heart' release and I happily did my first book signing in Los Angeles. That seemed to take up most of my time in the early summer, and now that I am working on my second novel, 'This Roll in My Soul', and it will take up most of my creative time till it's release in the fall of 2013.

As a Mommy I had a spectacular year with my son, and watching him grow gives me so much joy daily. I love to review the past year in photos just to see all the wonderful changes that he has gone through. As a family we did a lot of traveling to our favorite getaway Santa Ynez, during the summer and fall. We even fancied the idea of moving there, but it seems not to be the path we are on at the moment since Los Angeles was not quite done with us yet.

We lost our beloved kitty in November and the healing is still happening every day. He watches over us and we feel him everywhere, we missed him greatly over the holidays but somehow I believe he is with us, if only in our hearts.

Looking to 2013 I see a lot of exciting things happening, a few are cooking at this moment and I cannot wait to share the news as soon as I can. I have a lot of work to do, but I am going to create some time for learning as well. I do have goals, very concrete goals, some with deadlines, some just for my own well being. One is that I really want to take my yoga practice to the next level, and look forward to deepening my practice, giving it more time in my busy schedule. Of course I want to complete my second book, but I still want to focus on getting the word out with creative PR on my first book. I want to continue with my 'Readers of the Rock' campaign, and I've got a few doozies up my sleeve for the new year. Music wise, I would love love to play some shows and get my butt back up on stage before I forget how to do what I love to do.

I am so thankful for my beautiful family, my husband who I get to laugh with and love every day, for my son who lights up my world like the brightest star on top of my Christmas tree. I am so thankful for my Father and Mother who are still alive and kicking ass, my ass when needed, but your love is always constant, and your laughter fills my soul. My sister who inspires me with her strength and passion for living, her four gorgeous children- my niece and three nephews, my first loves, who are more like adults now than kids, but I enjoy all their ups and downs like they were my own. My step Mother who always lends a loving ear, more like my friend than parent, and to my second family, on my husbands side who are the most loving and supportive second family anyone could ever ask for. Lastly I am so truly grateful for my tribe. My beautiful friends whom I cherish deeply, through all my connections in life I have been so fortunate to come across some incredible souls... and even if we don't get to be together on a daily basis, you all are with me in my heart, and that is why it beats so strongly. I am truly blessed.

So here is to 2013, I'm gonna do my damnedest to make it one hell of a goody, and I hope you will do the same thing. Chase your dreams, where ever they will take you. Follow the light of happiness for it will lead you to places of true joy. And never give up, no matter what the odds. Life is about living it to your fullest potential. Love to your deepest capacity, and never forget to tell those around you that you love them. Our moments are precious, Cherish every one.  Happy New Year Everyone!! 

Goodbye my little furry friend

On Tuesday, November 13th, 2012,  I said goodbye to my best friend. My fat black and white tuxedo cat. My Moocher. He found me through a friend, who had found him begging in front of a Starbucks. She named him Saffron but couldn’t keep him since she already had two cats of her own. The first day I saw him, he was in her car on the way to the vet for a check up. She had told me that she had found an older kitten and needed to find a good home for him. I had wanted a kitty so I took a peek. When I looked into her car, at first I couldn’t see him. He was hiding under her seat and when I finally saw him, all I could see was his whiskers. The longest white whiskers on a tiny black and white cat. I fell in love in that instant and told her that I wanted to adopt him. 

That was about sixteen years ago. I couldn’t keep the name Saffron because it didn’t suit him, he was a mooch, and he loved food, all kinds of it… and his belly became as big as his heart over the years. He was with me through it all. My divorce. Moving to Hollywood. He was my best little buddy. My confidant. My muse. My bedtime teddy bear. My acrobat. My paper shredder. My midnight piano player. My vacuum cleaner. He was more like a dog, than any cat I have ever met. In that beautiful black and white fur coat, I dried many tears. Into those big yellow eyes I sang many songs. With his playtime, he would hide and rear up on his hind legs to wrap his paws around my leg and tackle me as I walked by, then run away as fast as he could, I’m sure laughing the whole way at my screams. He would chase his tail to such delight that he would do summersaults across the entire room and I would laugh hysterically at his antics. He fell in love with Tony before I did, and with every visit their ‘wrestling’ would become the highlight of Moochers day. I think that was one of the things that made me fall in love with Tony and see him as more than a friend and band mate… he played so well with my ‘child’, my cat, I knew he loved him as much as I did. My ex didn’t even like Moocher that much, he just tolerated him because I had wanted the kitty so damn much. 

 Tony became the only Daddy Moocher would ever know, and he loved Tony more than me I think sometimes. We threw parties for his birthdays; we dressed him up for Halloween. We even had a place at the table for him at Thanksgiving (his favorite holiday), and he had a stocking filled with toy mice and treats for every Christmas. Like most cats, he went through quite a few of his lives. We thought we had lost him once when he escaped through a window at my studio apartment in Hollywood, but thankfully we found him quickly before he found his way to the street. Then about seven years ago, when I moved in with Tony and I let Moocher go outside in the yard, he got really sick, twice, and the vets had urged me to put him down, thinking he had feline leukemia. We did everything we could for him, blood transfusions, oxygen tanks, IV’s, you name it, and we did it.  He recovered perfectly and we called him a super kitty after the second testing of negative for the disease.

 When I became pregnant I was worried how Moocher would react. He had been my ‘only child’ for so long, I felt maybe he would hate the baby. But as my belly grew, Moocher knew, and he would sleep with his arms and head on my belly and purr as the baby would kick at night, it was like they had their own language.  The day I brought Tyler home, Moocher acted like he had always known him and loved him, and the baby loved his kitty with his eyes until his little hands could grasp that cat’s fur. Mooch put up with so much torture from Tyler, and not once would he scratch or bite the baby, even if the baby was trying to pull the cat’s tail off. As Tyler grew, so did their games, and sadly since I was so pre-occupied with raising a child I didn’t notice that my beloved kitty was losing weight. Well, I did notice, but I told myself that he was just getting older. He still loved to play, and he and his little ‘brother’ would run all over the house chasing each other. He still would beg at every meal, and had learned the best part of having a toddler in the house was the food that missed the baby’s mouth, would fall on the floor, and he sat at the baby’s feet beside his high chair and wait for the inevitable. 

 He seemed to grow more inactive in the past few weeks and suddenly he stopped eating all together. We knew something was terribly wrong. I cried at his weight loss and begged him to eat but after a trip to the vet and many tests, we found out the news of stomach cancer that was too advanced and incurable. We said our goodbyes this afternoon and I held him till he was gone. I loved Moocher more than I have ever loved any pet. He was a huge part of our family. I can’t imagine another, and my heart hurts so badly now, that I don’t want to. The hardest part of it all is not crying in front of Tyler, who seems to understand that his kitty was very sick, but doesn’t know why the doctor could not ‘fix’ it. He may not remember any of it, or he may never forget. I know I won’t. Thank you Moocher for finding me. Thank you Moocher for all the years of unwavering love. Thank you Moocher, my kitty, my best friend. 

November's 'Reader of the Rock' is...

“This Rock in my Heart speaks directly to the will of an artist, striking a power chord with anyone who’s ever wielded an air guitar. Frankie Spencer stage dives off the page as a woman trying to make it happen in Hollywood as she courageously leaves everything behind that had been holding her back. Through Frankie, we revel in her rock-fueled journey amid the rancor, heartache and hidden fears that manifest when all you want to do is show what you've got. Tommie Vaughn has created a memorable and inspiring character who's as warm as she is edgy and brings the reader on a tumultuous yet uplifting journey that proves anything is possible with persistence, a little hard work and a whole lotta heart.”   
~David & Gennefer Gross, TV Writers / Producers




How cool is that?! Thanks so much Dave and Genn! I am honored to have such a dynamic writing team review my novel. 

Much love,
Tommie V

 

Rock your Vote!

I'm sitting here on a lovely Friday afternoon at the DMV, waiting to renew my drivers license. Not my ideal way I wanted to spend my day, but I must do this If I want to vote on Tuesday.

I cannot stress enough how important this election is, especially for women's rights. Every vote counts and there are many important propositions that need your vote, as well as the presidential candidates.

It will be worth every hour spent in this plastic chair, to cast my ballot on Tuesday.

See you at the polls!

IT'S HEATING UP AROUND HERE!! A REVIEW FROM ONE OF THE COOLEST LADIES IN ROCK N' ROLL!! AND THE 'READER OF THE ROCK' FOR OCTOBER IS...

In her debut novel “This Rock In My Heart,” Tommie Vaughn offers a juicy & insightful look into the Hollywood music scene. Teetering on that fine line between fact & fiction, Tommie clearly taps into her own wealth of personal experience to give the reader a sneak peak inside the head of a true artist struggling to make it in the City of Angels.

The book’s main character, Frankie Spencer, is so down to earth & likeable. She is someone I would totally want to hang out & drink red wine with! She exudes both confidence and vulnerability as well as a natural honesty and beauty that shines through on each page. She’s definitely a rare breed in a town full of fake tits & gold diggers. If there’s one thing I learned from Frankie Spencer, it’s that it’s who you KNOW not who you blow!!

Seriously though, this book both inspires me as an artist and at the same time makes me feel nostalgic about my own days of being a struggling musician full of hope, fear & Ramen noodles. If you’re looking for a fun, lighthearted read with just enough steamy romance to keep the pages turning, then look no further. This book is definitely for you!

~Abby Gennet
Slunt, Riot Brides
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Slunt/199402556771672

Go Ahead and do it... Expressing Motherhood

A good friend of mine was doing a play, or reading, or skit. I'm not sure what she called it, but she asked me if I would like to come and watch. She said it was kind of like the Vagina Monologues, except it was about Motherhood. Hmmmmmm.

Well, I thought, Motherhood starts with a vagina so this can't be too far off. She said basically the play was about real women's different stories, all about five minutes tops, on how motherhood has changed their lives. I love my friend and was very proud that she was putting herself and her writing out there, so of course I had to support.

I don't know what I was expecting, a bunch of mom's bitching about their kids, the lives they had before, the bodies that would never be the same. I mean, I'm a mommy and I know it's all true, but I guess my preconceived notion of what this show was going to be about didn't grab me right off the bat. In my life I have tried to do so much... with my music, with my writing, my art and now being a mom. Sure I bitched about some of it to my closest friends, but to a group of strangers? It didn't sound like much fun.  I don't know what I was so worried about, but it didn't matter, my friend was going for her dreams and I had to be there. I knew the piece that she was reading was super funny, as she had practiced it on me a few times, so I hoped for the best, dolled myself up and took my little ole' ass down to the Sunday afternoon show at the Banshee Theater on Magnolia Boulevard, in Burbank.

I had been double booked that day, and my husband had to go to work early, leaving me at a loss of a babysitter, but my friend assured me that she was in the first half of the show, and I could easily leave after her reading. I felt a bit guilty about it, but still I was relieved that I wouldn't be forced into two hours of this thing and I wouldn't have to miss my sweet friends performance either.

As I sat in the back row, in the closest seat to the door so I could run out of there as soon as my friend finished, I looked around the tiny theater with open interest. It was a lovely timeless theatre, seating around 60-70 people, and today it was filled with women. Women of all ages, shapes and sizes, huddled in groups of two or three, all happily chatting to each other. There were even a few men, who had expressions that seemed to mirror my own inner fears of 'Good Lord, what am I doing here?'

It was about then that I felt it. The comradery of motherhood. The comradery of women. We were a special club, that only those with stretch marks could attend. People can lecture you about how to raise a child, how to get your body, your sex drive, your relationships back after giving birth to another human being, they may even have a PhDs. on the subject... but until they themselves go through the act of pushing a watermelon out of their vagina, they don't know what the fuck they are talking about. And they are not invited in this club.

It was about this moment that I began to smile to myself as I started to flip through the program of 'Expressing Motherhood'. I learned that this show had been created by two friends, two mothers of course, named Lindsay Kavet and Jessica Cribbs back in 2008. Not too shabby, I thought. A lot of bands didn't last that long, so these girls must have been doing something right.

As I began to read about the different performers, thier biography's were indeed all so varied, from every walk of life. A few actors sure, some comediennes, my sweet friend Jaquelyn De Longe with her 'I'm a hottie mommy' photo, a lot of writers, and a handful of regular moms. The bio's were so cleverly written I had to stifle my laughter, feeling like the typical girl in the back row of class, that was always causing trouble. I started to relax and look forward to the dimming of the lights, that seemed to come immediately after I had thunk it.

The play begins with the two lovely gals who created the play, Lindsay and Jessica who welcome everyone, give back with a raffle of cool gifts, and a final word of 'relax and enjoy, someone else is taking care of your kids.' Which made the entire audience chuckle. The lights dim again and the first performer walks onto the stage.

I admit it. I loved this show. I laughed out loud. I openly cried. And was pissed as hell when I had to leave early. I actually stayed longer than I should have,  I couldn't pry myself away. I was having too much fun. The women reminded me of everything that I had feared about becoming a mother. About becoming so human that I felt everything around me, good and bad, and could no longer only focus on what I wanted, what I thought was important in MY world.

I had motherhood all wrong. I thought you lost everything when you had a child, when in truth you gain everything, and then some. Becoming a mommy to me has been the greatest blessing, that I had always thought, was not going to be a part of my chosen rock n roll life.

I had Expressing Motherhood all wrong too. I'm going back this Saturday night to watch the entire show if anyone wants to join me? If you can't do Saturday night, there is a show on Friday and two on Sunday as well, but then it's over and you will have surly missed something special. These women are brilliant, funny and real. As they bravely walk on stage and tell their five minute monologue, it gives you just a peek of what it's like to be a Mom. Without any fear of stretch marks.

Find out more information about the show here: http://www.expressingmotherhood.com/