Sunday, December 12, 2010

Babies and Rock n Roll don't mix

Yeah I know, some may argue the fact... and before yesterday I would have been the president of the club. First off, I would like to say that we have raised our son with music constantly saturating his tiny sweet soul. We play guitar, piano, sing our hearts out or have Pandora streaming in the background spinning a mix of Bowie, Stones, T-Rex, Lennon, The Velvet Underground, Fleetwood Mac, Pretenders, Petty, to Mozart, Debussy... I mean we even play jazz we love music so damn much. He has taken an interest in playing the piano and loves to sit on Mommies lap and bang around on the keys and he has even begun to sing with us as we practice our songs- and it is pretty much the cutest thing you have ever heard.
Now all this aside, what happened yesterday was a not cute at all. Wall of Tom had a last minute show and since we didn't have a babysitter we thought, oh it's a day show- we can just bring him and he will love it! I had visions of him watching Mommy and Daddy on stage smiling and cooing, even the flitting thought that he could come on stage with us and fall asleep in my arms like he has so many times before as we practice at home. I am delusional. When we arrived at the venue he was asleep and so we just plopped him in his stroller and wheeled him in back stage. Easy. Set up all our gear, greeted the bookers, grabbed some water, shook a few hands. Easy. When it was time for us to start the booker of the event had sweetly said she would watch the baby while we played- being a Mommy to be she is about 5 months pregnant and said she needs the practice, we say 'Perfect'. Easy. The show begins, it is a really nice turnout for the Holiday Market and we are totally enjoying ourselves since it is our first show back on stage after having the baby.
Of course always a Mommy, my eyes are touching back to my sleeping child in the stroller being wheeled through the crowd happily by the sweet Mommy to be. So Easy. About three quarters through the set I notice that the blanket covering the stroller was now up and my heart skips a beat. Uhhh Ohh, he is awake. As I sing I watch in horror as the lovely people begin to peek into the stroller and smile at such a cute little baby... I notice my sons head moving left and right and then as my stomach falls as I belt out the next verse, the sweet Mommy to be reaches in to comfort the clearly upset child and cradle him in her arms.
I am sweating now not from the lights but from the feeling of vomit that is slowly easing up my throat as my child's face turns the color of purple and he lets out the most blood curdling scream that can be heard well above the music. Tony and I look at each other on stage and I think to myself- 'just give him to me, it will be fine- he just needs to see Mommy with all of those strange faces around him'... still delusional and in the middle of a crescendo. I motion for the sweet Mommy to be (who has got to be questioning the whole Mommy thing at about that time) to just hand me my boy. The song is almost over and as I reach down for him, he leaps to my awaiting arms and is quiet for the rest of the song sitting on my hip and staring into my face. Awwwww so sweet he is.
The song ends and the crowd begins to cheer, not just for the music but for the beautiful sight of a sweet baby on stage with his musical parents. At the sound of applause my sweet little boy turns his face to the crowd, sucks in his breath, bulges out his eyes in utter shock and opens his mouth to shriek in a key louder than I have ever experienced in any Aerosmith concert. Yep. That just happened. As I ran off stage left, Tony closed the show with two songs he could sing by himself and I was alone backstage with a inconsolable child.
So what did we learn today? Other than that I am a delusional musical Mother? I learned that babies should not go to live shows until they understand what it is, and they should not be on stage unless they want to be on stage. Also never to leave a sleeping child with a roomful of strangers, and that when you finally become a Mommy- it does not matter what you are doing, saving the world or singing on stage- you are forever changed and tuned in to one and only one radio station that is your child for the rest of your life. I just hope I have not ruined my child forever and now he wants to be a banker or something... actually, a banker would not be bad.

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